Keep Reaching Out

There are times in life where it can be far more difficult to ask for help or support rather than to carry your burdens on your own,

Perhaps you finally have summoned the strength to explain to somebody that you need their help. You might have told them what's going on in your life that you cannot seem to handle on your own. Maybe you've vented to them about the anxiety that has taken hold of you or the grief that you cannot shake off or the loneliness that haunts you even when you are around people. You chose somebody you thought you could confide in, told them your troubles, and hopefully things would feel a little better after you finally let it all out

Sometimes, they do. But other times, it seems like you didn't get anywhere. Maybe they brushed off what you told them because they had no idea what to say in response to your request or perhaps, they jumped to conclusions and tried to solve your problems before you could finish telling them. Perhaps they told you positive, uplifting things that didn't really apply to your situation when all you needed was for somebody to simply be there for you. They could have responded to your plea by doing the opposite of listening to your concerns. Either way, you walked away feeling like you were alone in your burden, if you felt like anything at all. And if this has happened to you, I hope you remember something. I hope you remember that just because somebody didn't respond well to your plea for help does not mean your struggles are not as burdensome as you feel them to be nor should it deter you from seeking help in the future

It can be extremely hard to find somebody to talk to about the burdens and struggles we all face in our lives

Sometimes the hardest part is not mustering up the courage to talk to somebody in the first place but rather continue asking until you find somebody you can confide in

When I think of courage and people showing courage, I often don't think about big, heroic acts where people do seemingly impossible feats of strength. I think about smaller gestures of incredible bravery. I think about the kind of courage it takes to say, "I need help" or "I need someone to listen to me." I think about the bravery and strength it takes to acknowledge that what is happening in your life is too much for you to handle alone. Those are often the kinds of courage we don't see much of, but we all have moments where we display incredible reserves of it

The truth of the matter is some people are not good with other people's burdens

Some people don't know how to handle heavy grief and pain and don't know how to be supportive even if they want to be. Some people get so caught up in the idea of solving other people's problems that they fail to listen to or be there for the people most in need of support. Some people are carrying their own burdens and don't have the emotional bandwidth to carry other people's troubles as well. Their response to you might be the reason why, but it should not dictate your perception of your burdens, nor should it change the fact that you deserve somebody to stand by you, listen to you, and support you the way you need to be supported.

If you were to plant a seed in a barren patch of soil and it failed to grow, you would not then decide that no plant has any business trying to grow at all. No, you'd try to plant a different seed elsewhere with more fertile soil so that it has a better chance of survival so it can thrive. After all, it was not the seed that failed. It was the barren dirt that failed the seed. The same principle applies to people as well. Just because some people aren't equipped to carry other people's burdens doesn't mean those people do not deserve to have burdens lit by somebody who knows how to listen to them or someone who knows how to support them. Not all hearts are capable of bearing other people's burdens. Some people are supposed to carry other people's pain and struggles for them, and some people are merely meant to celebrate the good times with those who need them most. Knowing the difference is not a bad thing.